What is a Daddy Kink?

Having a daddy kink just means than you like to call your partner daddy, or that you like your partner to call you daddy, and something abut that resonates with your sexuality. You don’t have to be into DD/lg to have a daddy kink. It is extremely common for women to refer to their men, or even just men that they find attractive, as “daddy”. If you aren’t aware of this and haven’t experienced that yourself, its only because there is so much controversy around that use of the word, and its generally not considered socially acceptable, so it’s often not used in public.

Daddy Kink is Nothing New

Daddy kink has been around for centuries. Surely, there have always been kinky people and the use of the word “daddy” to describe a male lover has probably dates back to the creation of the word itself around the year 1523. It’s well documented that prostitutes have been referring to their pimps as daddy since as far back as 1681 or earlier. Use of the word specifically as a term for a male lover dates back to at least the early 1900s. That usage was especially prominent in African American culture, and found its way into many blues songs from that era. By the late 1940s the term was also widely found in the popular music of the time. In the Hank Williams song “Love Sick Blues”, written in 1922 and released in 1949, he sings “Lord, I loved to hear when she called me sweet daddy”. In another Hank Williams song, “Moanin’ the Blues” from 1950, he also refers to himself as daddy in the third-person with the line “your daddy is lonesome”. Marilyn Monroe had a song called “Every Baby Needs a Da-Da-Daddy” which was filmed in 1948, complete with baby talk and the use of baby dolls as props.

Male Authority Within Relationship Dynamics is Nothing New

Regarding the husband as the leader of the household is not a new concept, it is deep-seated in our culture, and in Christianity. The word husband has its roots in Old Norse and translates the “master of the house”, and in wedding vows, women have vowed to obey their husbands since the early 1500s. Only recently in history has the word “obey” become more controversial and been removed from many couple’s wedding vows. It’s also traditional at weddings for the father of the bride to walk her down the aisle and to “give away” the bride to the husband. This tradition symbolizes the transfer of authority, ownership, and paternal obligations from the father to the husband. To this day its common to regard the husband as the “head of the household”.

Viewing Male Leaders as Father Figures is Nothing New

Viewing male leaders as father figures is also not new. We refer to the founders of our country as our founding fathers. We even paternalize God, referring to him as “father” both in the sense of being our creator and in being the father of Jesus Christ. We also call Christian pastors and Catholic priests “father”. In Sicilian culture the title of “Godfather” has also been adopted to denote the highest possible rank in the mafia, the boss of all bosses. Commanding great respect and great power has a long-standing history of being closely associated with the word “father”.

What Do Men Like About Being Called Daddy?

Men like to be called daddy, and women like to call their boyfriends, husbands, and doms daddy for a wide variety of reasons. The significance behind the title of “daddy”, or even just the use of it in the bedroom, can have different meanings to different people. Not everyone likes to be called “daddy” for the same reasons, but there are lots of good reasons, and this is not at all an uncommon or unusual kink to have.

It’s a Term of Endearment That Reinforces Male Dominance

Being both a term of endearment and signifying great power and great respect, it’s not at all surprising that the word “daddy” has found its way into power exchange relationship dynamics or into the bedroom. “Master” is also a very common title and it’s not surprising to see that word used in the same context either. But “daddy” tends to come across as warmer and more loving than “master”. A large percentage of women like men to be dominant and to take on an almost paternal leadership role in their lives to some extent, even if they are not specifically into BDSM. So the title of “daddy” just fits, and its easy to see the mass appeal of the word in this context, even outside of BDSM.

Being a Father Figure is His Primary Role in Life

In many cultures, Hispanic culture for example, couples commonly call each other the equivalent of “mommy” and “daddy” (“mami” and “papi” in this case). This is not incestuous in nature, just as “daddy” is not incestuous in nature. Each is simply referring to the other according to their primary role in their life (mothers and fathers) out of respect. Much the same thing is taking place within a DD/lg relationship, and in relationships that have a daddy kink element to them. The titles of “Daddy” and “babygirl” are awarded according to each partner’s primary role in the other’s life, “Daddy” as a caretaker and father-like figure in babygirl’s life, and “babygirl” as the sweet, innocent, most special, most precious, most cherished, center of his whole world. Daddy may also be an actual father, she may want him to be the father of her children, or they might not have or want kids but do still want to have this same dynamic in the relationship anyways.

It Acknowledges His Protective and Guiding Role in Her Life

The title of “daddy” can simultaneously simply acknowledge the protective and guiding leadership role he plays in her life, whether he is an actual father or not, and whether they want to have children together or not. Men need to be needed, and this acknowledgement makes him feel loved and appreciated. Whether acknowledged or not, men have certain obligations towards women in general. It isn’t only fathers that have nurturing and protective obligations towards their daughters, all men have this same obligation to all women and all children. There is a very good reason why when there are wars it has always historically been the men on the front lines protecting the country while the women and children remain at home. In particular, the obligations a husband has towards his wife significantly overlap the obligations fathers have towards their daughters. Being fatherly is far from a bad thing.